“You’ve really got to hand it to short people, I mean… they can’t reach it themselves.”
If you’re short, you’ve heard it all, every joke you can imagine involving your size and how “cute” and diminutive you are. Every time I hear one I grit my teeth and laugh like I haven’t heard it a million times before, and go about my day with the dulcet tones of the dying screams of my enemies in my ears. I wish, or at last to cut them down to size a bit, literally.
Needless to say, I’m short, been short my whole life, and have clothes from my 9th grade year I can still nearly fit into… it’s FRUSTRATING to say the least. I’ve done everything I can to help my growth, protein packed diets, stretching regimes, even, and I’m embarrassed to say this, hanging upside down by my feet. All it got me was ripped (not bad, admittedly), flexible (could be worse), and a screaming headache brought on by blood rushing to my head.
I had given up on growing and figured I was just going to stay short for the rest of my life, when along came Growth Sinerama. It was one of those nights when I’d just heard one too many short jokes, and decided it was time to take things into my own hands. I searched the internet, scouring it for every piece of information and evidence that I could find on how to get my body back into growth mode so I could stop being a midget in a land of giants.
Growth Sinerama was absolutely the answer I was looking for, I started taking it as it says on the label, and it wasn’t long before I started to notice results. The results, at first, were strange feelings in my joints, a sort of tingling and an aching in my bones, the kind of ache I hadn’t felt in a really long time. It took me a while to remember what it was… growing pains! That was the blessed ache of my bones starting to get back in the process of moving me out of shrimpsville and into the place where the real people live!
It took months, and those aches and pains were periodic but welcome, I knew I couldn’t have the height I wanted and skip the growing pains that come with them. I was always smiling when that happened, because I knew it meant that Growth Sinerama was working and that I wouldn’t be short anymore.
A year later and I’ve added 4 inches to my height, it may not sound like a lot, but the world looks a lot different from 5’5” than it did from 5’1”. I’m still taking Growth Sinerama, and I’m still watching the marks on the wall (Yeah yeah, laugh all you want, it worked when we were kids). I can’t wait to see what the next year is going to bring as I keep including this in my diet. I’m sure there’s a limit to what it can do, but I hope I haven’t reached it yet, I’d like to be a solid 5’8” before I’m done, and I’m well on my way!
Growth Sinerama, when you’re tired of constantly being looked down on, it’s time to start kicking those growth hormones into overdrive. Reach for the skies!